Kralnor

This is a silly article.
The content of this article is not part of official Warcraft lore, but has nevertheless become part of the World of Warcraft culture or community.

Kralnor's Portrait

Kralnor is the name of an orc warlock player character in the popular MMORPG "World of Warcraft." His fame began when he posted a thread called "Warlock staff users" in the Warlock Forums of the Blizzard website May 16, 2005. The post asked readers to post information about the two-handed staff they preferred to use in the game. This idea was nothing new, however the manner in which Kralnor asked the readers to post was original.

The original post

The original post was fraught with grammar and spelling errors. It was also extremely vague and alluded to Kralnor getting in trouble somehow by being reported. It lacked any information about his own staff, yet did contain a comment about proofreading. The original post is as follows:

I dont like to stress the fact that the warlock rocks, but he jus does. So, for all you staff users out there, feel free to come in and post, my staff is a good one, but here is how it goes
1. post message in the room
2. LOOK IT OVER
3. dont report anything, i might get in trouble :)
and 4. Have fun!!!

This simple statement unwittingly opened a Pandora’s Box that delved into to a seldom explored part of the warlock psyche. At first, readers didn’t know how to respond to this post. Several posted their staff and simply moved on. Many flamed Kralnor for his spelling and the post’s lack of meaning or sense.

Kralnor later responded to all the questions with:

ok, guys, how simple can you be? ITS A !&$%ING TOPIC ABOUT STAFF USERS, if your not a staff user, GET YOUR ASS OUT!!!!!!!! Jesus!!!!

However, the thread was started during a time when warlocks were generally unhappy with the game mechanics involving their class.

Warlocks had many topics they wanted Blizzard to address. Issues included: the worthlessness of endgame pets, soul shards (needed to cast certain spells) taking up too much space in ones inventory, the lack of an escape ability like a mage’s "Blink" spell or a rogue’s "Vanish" and the refusal of Blizzard developers and forum moderators to address these concerns or even answer questions posed by players left many feeling abandoned. In game, only warlocks of the highest skill avoided being killed repeatedly by players of the opposing faction. Many created new characters or canceled their accounts outright. All of these issues were asked to be addressed constantly in the Warlock Forum and as a result, the mood of the forum was extremely dissatisfied to say the least.

This unrest, coupled with the fact that a warlock’s definition of sanity is fairly blurry, generated over 100 pages of posts on the "Warlock staff users" thread. Once the thread hit 46 pages, many readers were unable to view any following pages due to a bug in the forum. This did not prevent warlocks from posting content or simply "bumping" the thread to the main page of the forum. Warlocks composed songs and poems, speculated on the meaning of the elusive Kralnor figure, made websites and even t-shirts. Kralnor never replied to any of the responses to his original post except once. This mystique only fueled the warlock’s interest and elevated Kralnor’s popularity to Godlike proportions. When the thread was finally deleted from the forum it had been responded to well over 1200 times. Warlocks have adopted the cause of petitioning Blizzard to add an extremely powerful staff that references Kralnor in the title. Atiesh, Greatstaff of the Guardian was not what the warlocks had in mind.

Official references

Kralnor, immortalized by Blizzard in this sneak-peak screenshot of the Arena

There are 4 known Blizzard responses to this cultural phenomenon.

1. The sneak peek preview of the arenas. In the picture (right), Kralnor is shown in full Tier 4 Voidheart Raiment with a staff of indistinct design.
   
   
2. The blood elf race page on Blizzard.com. There is a direct reference to Kralnor in the alternate text of the banner image here.
   
   
3. On the 2007 April Fool's Day jokepage about a new [Tinfoil Hat], a short poem (from the "Book of Kralnor") can be seen when highlighted on the left side of the webpage, under where the webpage's navigation is halfway down the page. It displays:

   To staff of warlock none compare
   Leaves its enemies seeing double
   To defy its power none would dare
   Don't report anything, I might get in trouble

   In addition, the class ID of the <div> code where the above appears is "ronlark", which is Kralnor spelled backwards.
   
   
4. Kralnor is featured in his own card (TDP #220) in the first World of Warcraft Trading Card Game expansion, Through the Dark Portal. The card rules reads:

   When Kralnor enters play, you may search your deck for a Staff card and let everyone LOOK IT OVER. If you do, shuffle your deck and put that card on top.

   The flavor text at the bottom of the card reads: "My staff is a good one."

 

See also: Kralnor (alternative), Alamo

External links

• Warlock Staff Users Preservation Project - Thanks to Lacylia.
• Original Post - How it all started, in it's original format.
• The Book of Kralnor - A must read.
• A Morrowind Tribute to Kralnor - A Morrowind mod that adds Kralnor and his legendary staff to the game.
• Kralnor's Armory profile